Welcome to the first edition of Gay, Not Gay, or European (also known as Tigh, Garrett, or David Beckham). This is a blatant and unabashed rip-off of a segment on the Ticket radio station.
The idea to put this segment on SPB came during our long, grueling, and manly mountain bike session this weekend (one that still has me limping like an 80 year old woman). A guy rode by wearing a full spandex biking outfit. This sparked a gay/not gay conversation. For the record, I'm saying not gay. Also, during the ride the conversation kept casually returning to Casey giving everyone Handy Js. Not sure why.
The first topic of debate for Gay, Not Gay, or European is cherry chapstick. This topic was brought forth to the committee by Tigh and I have a strong suspicion that he wants to use this forum to convince himself and others that cherry chapstick is an acceptable male product.
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| Sebastian doesn't think cherry chapstick is gay. Do you? |
Tigh's Boss (enters elevator as Tigh is re-applying said cherry flavored chapstick): Morning Stephen... was that... chapstick? Cherry flavored chapstick?
Tigh (embarrassingly stuffing the stick back in his pocket): Morning. Uh.. yes sir. My lips are chapped from my mountain bike ride this weekend.
Tigh's Boss: Are you gay son? Are you a middle school girl about to suck her first dick? Are your lips chapped from mountain biking or from an all-night sausage buffet?
Tigh: Wow sir, I don't think that was appropriate to say in this crowded elevator. No sir I'm not gay. It's just chapstick which is manly as old spice.
Tigh's Boss: No, its not just chapstick Susie. Its cherry chapstick. Why don't you just slap a Gay Pride sticker on your man-purse and give $1 BJs in the men's room?
Tigh: Well... uh... sir... it came in a variety pack and I didnt want to just throw it away.
Tigh's Boss: Why did you buy a variety pack, Sally? One for each flavor of cock you want to swallow?
Tigh: Sir this is getting uncomfortable. It's just chapstick.
Tigh's Boss: Whatever you say Stephanie.
So what do you think SPBers? Gay? Not gay? European? Leave your comments below (Tigh, if you can't figure out how to comment, send it to me or Ian and we will do it for you).
As an avid chapstick user I would have to say that chapstick as a whole is not gay, but cherry chapstick is teetering on the edge of bi-curious. It makes your lips turn the slightest shade of red, and it looks like lipstick to the untrained eye. I'm going to say that cherry chapstick is gay, but as a whole chapstick is not gay. Just don't buy the stupid variety pack and stick to the regular scented stuff, you'll avoid the ridicule of most, except Garrett, the chapstick hating pussy.
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